My heart is overwhelmed with joy at the thought of God's goodness. I try to express with words how thankful I am for all He has done (and continues to do) for me, but I fail with tear filled eyes. Four days from now I will be boarding a plane bound for Sri Lanka, venturing into the realms of the unknown. I have been praying about this trip for some time now and it is exciting to finally see our date for departure getting closer and closer.
I've heard it said that it's not just about the destination, but it's also about the journey getting there. As believers in Christ, I think we can focus too much on what God has in store for the future, instead of relishing in what He is doing here and now. Don't get me wrong, I'm definitely a dreamer and I can't wait to see what doors He opens on the horizon, but I also don't want to miss out on what He is doing and the growth that is taking place in my own life now. And this present "journey" has been FILLED to the brim with opportunities of growth.
Five months ago I was fearful of signing up for this trip. I knew there was no way I could personally come up with the funds and everything inside told me it was foolish to take that step of faith if I already knew the outcome (Apparently five months ago I was also foolish enough to think I knew the future!). During that time I had a conversation with a sweet friend of mine and I was encouraged to "step out" and not allow something like finances drive my decision making. If God wanted me there, He would provide. It was time to put my faith in motion.
Three months ago my faith "muscles" were stretched to their maximum capacity. I hadn't met any of the financial deadlines and I wasn't seeing any evidence of His provision. I stressed, worried, and questioned whether I had made the right choice by taking on this endeavor. But like Hebrews 11:1 says, "Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen." Faith doesn't require sight. God hadn't provided me with any indication that this wasn't the right path and even though I couldn't figure out how it could possibly come together, I was learning how to trust the One who could.
Six weeks ago I thought I was getting the hang of things. My faith and trust in God was growing beautifully and I was on cloud nine. Any time I had doubt I felt as though He would reach down and touch my heart with peace, opening up my eyes to what He was doing all around me. Then all at once, through the means of my car accident, I was faced with the opportunity to gain a new perspective and really dive into trusting God on an entirely different level. First it was Spiritually, then it became physically.
Now, as I sit here and recap these past few weeks I've just endured, I am a mixed bag of emotion. I've seen God's faithfulness, love, and provision in countless ways. He has faithfully provided me with, not only the rest of the funds for my trip, but even the means of provision for the necessities I will need for the journey. His love has been poured out through the financial support of family, friends, and even strangers. Each one of them has filled my heart with joy and reminded me, through their actions, of how God provides for His children. But just as I have been in awe of Christ and all He has done, I am full aware of the enemy who isn't happy with any part of it. This week in particular has been a battle emotionally as Satan has been fighting hard to tear me down. Unfortunately, he knows just the right nerve to hit that makes me crumble to the floor, but I'm thankful for my God who is right there to pick me up again.
With everything the Lord has been doing in my life, in this short time period, I am excited to see what He does in these next few weeks as my team heads out to Sri Lanka this Thursday. I ask that you would please keep my team in prayer for the time spent away from our families as we grow together in the Lord, building community with one another. Also, that God would knit our hearts together as a team and that He would ultimately be glorified in everything we do.
With everything the Lord has been doing in my life, in this short time period, I am excited to see what He does in these next few weeks as my team heads out to Sri Lanka this Thursday. I ask that you would please keep my team in prayer for the time spent away from our families as we grow together in the Lord, building community with one another. Also, that God would knit our hearts together as a team and that He would ultimately be glorified in everything we do.
With love,
Aj
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